Woman Says Her Wealthy Boyfriend Is Making Her Pay Rent, Even Though He Owns the House They’re Living in

A woman says her wealthy, homeowner boyfriend wants her to start paying rent — but she’s not sure he’s coming from the most logical place.

On the U.K.-based forum Mumsnet, the woman wrote that she recently moved in with her partner after dating for three years to a two-bedroom home that he owns “outright.”

“He bought it with money from a family trust set up for him when he was born. He rents out one bedroom to his friend for [about $900 a month]. We share the other bedroom. He wants me to pay him [around $450 a month] on top of all bills, which are split equally three-ways,” the woman wrote. “We also split the cost of any house repairs that need doing.”

According to the woman, her boyfriend “says the arrangement will make us both richer — as I will be paying less than market rent for a similar room.”

However, the woman explained that her boyfriend’s request for rent came as a surprise to her. “When we first spoke about finances, before I moved in, he said that the money I saved in rent could be put towards making our lives ‘bigger,’ ” she said. “When discussing this recently, he said that this was still true, that the money I pay him can go towards his masters course fees, for example, and that this will benefit us both long-term.”

Since her boyfriend doesn’t have a mortgage, the woman wrote that she “can’t see why” she should pay him rent.

“The amount is small, but I’m not sure how I feel about it in principle,” she explained, noting, still, that she is “benefitting hugely,” given that she is paying way less than if she were to rent a place on her own at market rates.

The woman did highlight, however, that she is “very much sharing” the room with her boyfriend, who she said still hasn’t made space for many of her things that are “currently in boxes in cupboards/storage.”

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The woman added, “I also end up doing most of the housework and I worry that if I am giving him money on top of that and on top of bills, etc., I will become resentful. I’m also not sure what his motivations are for asking me to give him money, since he doesn’t really need it.”

Some of the Mumsnet forum users also expressed concerns about the boyfriend’s motivation behind asking the woman for rent.

“Long term, will he ever put you on his deeds? Will you sell, then buy together, and he ring fences all his cash? Will he be a [stay-at-home] in that case, as you’ll be earning to pay your half?! Lots to think about there,” one person wrote.

Another person added, “Personally I think it’s unfair to charge ‘rent’ to a partner. Contribute yes, but you’re letting a man who’s been given a property in all essence and who’s getting a passive and healthy income … charge you rent for what? Living in boxes and out of a bag. Secure your own finances instead of lining his pocket.”

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Others, meanwhile, weren’t so sure that it was wrong of the man to ask for some financial help from his girlfriend, though they thought he went about it the wrong way.

“In principle, it makes sense that you should pay some sort of rent as you live there, but that should have been clearly agreed between you before you moved in,” said one user.