Nikki Garcia Breaks Silence on Messy Divorce from Artem Chigvintsev: ‘I Was in So Much Pain’

Nikki Garcia is opening up about her split from Artem Chigvintsev for the first time.

The retired WWE star, 41, returned to her podcast, The Nikki & Brie Show, on Monday, Dec. 2 after more than three months away following her ex-husband’s Aug. 28 arrest on suspicion of corporal injury to spouse. Her return comes days after she and Chigvintsev settled their divorce on Nov. 21 in private mediation.

Nikki began the episode with a preface that she would “try my best not to get too emotional” as she gave an update on the last few months of her life.

“I disconnected from social media, from the world, and I just knew that I needed to disconnect because first things first, I’m a mom and my son’s protection and privacy is the most important. So I was gonna do whatever it took for that most importantly, and then just needing space for healing, for facing trauma head on, all of that,” she said, referring to her 4-year-old son Matteo, whom she shares with Chigvintsev.

“It’s been really tough. I’ve been heartbroken. Sad. You know, you dream of having this family and you have this incredible love and it just goes the other way. And you go from having a great love story to having a terrible one. And I never saw any of it coming, you know, as far as, like, what the ending would be.”

She said that her son has remained her priority amidst the end of the relationship and the legal battle that ensued, as she shared, “I tried to handle this whole situation even though I was in so much pain. I was just trying to do what was best for everyone.”

“I do want to continue to protect Mateo in those ways because that’s what’s been the hardest part about all this, and that’s been so heartbreaking. I didn’t know that your heart can break that many times in such a short period of time.”

Nikki also shed light on the nature of her relationship with the former DWTS pro, who she married in 2022, as she admitted, “When it came to our relationship, it’s sad. Like, it just hasn’t been great for a long time. And I really played it up [that] things were a lot better than what they were in the public eye, which I have regrets in that because what I felt was, like, if I can just put this person on a pedestal and maybe if this person hears it enough, what I believe in them, they can believe that in themselves.”

“I didn’t wanna have another failed public relationship,” she continued. “And more than any of that, take it away, like, I wanted it for Matteo. You know, it’s it always comes back to him. You fight for your kids. We should have probably walked away a long time ago. So in the end, what happened wouldn’t have happened.”

The Total Bellas alum also admitted that it’s been a “struggle” dealing with the split in the public eye as people were being “fed lies” about her.

“But because I know the truth and I actually lived it, it had it didn’t have a big effect on me because people weren’t there that day. People don’t know what I’ve gone through to what I am going through, and you’re always going to have people just assume things and say things, and then, you know, when they get fed lies, you’re gonna have people also believe things. All I need to do is focus on my healing. I need to focus on Matteo’s healing.”

Following his Aug. 28 arrest, Chigvintsev did not face criminal charges, and both he and Nikki have alleged that the other person was the aggressor in the incident that led to the arrest.

They were both granted protective orders against each other following the arrest, both of which were dropped when they settled their divorce last month.

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Nikki previously asked for “privacy for her and her family” in a statement to PEOPLE and after filing for divorce, she continued to “ask for privacy for her and her family.” Meanwhile, Chigvintsev also shared a statement with PEOPLE following the divorce filing and after it was announced he is not facing criminal charges for the arrest, explaining how he was “incredibly relieved and grateful that the domestic violence charges against me have been dropped” and said he’s “thankful that the truth has prevailed.”