When was the last time you had a completely free weekend? For many parents, weekends are often spent taking the kids to sports fixtures, clubs, birthday parties or other activities, with families feeling more tired by the end of it rather than refreshed and ready for a new week.
Cue the idea of ’empty weekend parenting’, a response to over-scheduled weekends where you instead clear your diary in favour of more low-key or spontaneous family days out, or simply spending time together at home.
This is something my family tried for ourselves recently, after recognising how tired we all were following a busy Christmas and the return to work, school and nursery. The wet and miserable winter weather meant that there was nowhere we really wanted to be, either, so we made the decision to avoid making any plans and see how we all felt.
How we spent the weekend
There was a noticeable sense of relief from my eldest son when we told him we had nowhere to be or no plans for the weekend, and he woke up that Saturday morning around 7:30 am (a lie-in in our house), excited for a slow morning watching cartoons in his pyjamas.
Even taking the pressure off getting up and out of the house early on a Saturday morning made a huge difference for all of us. Often, if we have somewhere to be on the weekend, we might still need to be up and out before 9 am, but our empty weekend meant that we could take things much slower, enjoy homemade waffles for breakfast and get washed and dressed when we were ready, rather than scrambling around in a rush like we so often are during the week.
I was expecting some moans of being bored and wanting to go out somewhere, but instead, playing with no time restrictions or limits sparked a new creativity. My sons became builders, using everything they could find around the house to build houses, then knock them down again. Their imaginations led them to play as policemen, firefighters and superheroes, and they got on together better than they have in a long time, allowing us parents some rare time to actually relax and tackle some jobs around the house that we don’t always have time for.
We did find that with two youngsters in the house, there was some excess energy to burn, but playing in the garden, a quick walk to the local park and letting off steam on their trampoline all helped, and the boys were actually happy not to be doing much more.
Keeping the weekend free of plans and with no rushing around helped us all to feel so much more relaxed, and allowed it to be much more restful – and also productive – than normal. We played games, baked some snacks and did activities like drawing, painting and reading together, but also each had the time to do something for ourselves – whether it was building LEGO, doing a workout or catching up on a favourite TV show.
© Getty ImagesMy verdict
My husband and I both noted that our ’empty weekend’ had actually been one of our favourites for a while, showing that sometimes doing nothing is exactly what we need, and weekends packed with back-to-back activities or outings aren’t always more fun.
It’s made us consider how we plan our weekends going forward, too. While empty weekends aren’t feasible all of the time, and would mean missing out on fun outings or seeing family and friends, where possible, we’re trying to balance our time so when we have a busy Saturday, the Sunday is clear of plans, or if we have lots on one weekend, the following one allows for a slower pace.
So far this is working really well for us, and while things may change in time if my sons decide they want to play a sport or start other clubs or activities, for now we are enjoying the simplicity of more low-key activities together, and the joy of not needing to set alarms on the weekends – even if my toddler still does insist on waking up at 5 am!Â
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