I’ll be the first to hold my hands up and say the dreaded quarter-life crisis hit me hard.
Ever since reaching the ripe old age of 25 a year-and-a-half ago, I’ve been living under an unshakable, existential raincloud that seems to have set up a permanent camp over my head.
Thoughts about the direction of my life and the unexpected aches in my back started to spur on internal monologues daily, totally and utterly sabotaging any chance I had of becoming ‘chill’ once my frontal cortex was fully developed.
Alas, said vacuum of despair finally swallowed up my sense of style. It’s hard to admit as a fashion writer, as your style is your entire brand, but I lost sight of my personal aesthetic. It was as if a big ‘SOS’ sign was slapped onto my wardrobe.
Amidst the internal carnage (my therapist says I have a habit of mentally snowballing – can’t imagine why) my previously acute sense of style was uprooted. Suddenly, the beloved all-black outfits and Charlie’s Angels-inspired concoctions seemed passé. Colour became a source of intrigue, perhaps because a hard shot of dopamine was clearly needed. My entire personality melted away from beneath my Y2K tees and longline leather jackets.
So, desperately seeking reassurance, I turned to my editor Natalie. Did she have a quarter-life crisis, and if so, did it affect her style? “Tania, I’m wearing a low-waisted belt and I’m a millennial. My quarter-life crisis never ended.” Case closed.
It was time to bring in the big guns, so we consulted Dr. Sarah Boss, psychiatrist and clinical director of The Balance: “A quarter-life crisis is not an official clinical diagnosis, but it is a very real concept that often comes up in psychotherapeutic practice.”
She adds: “When people experience life crises, their whole self-expression can change instantly. If someone is keeping things like friends, family, and routine stable while they experiment with different clothes or makeup, that’s great. That’s experimenting with self-expression. At a young age, this is a beautiful way to learn about yourself, especially if you’ve previously been in a restricted environment that did not allow for this kind of play. This freedom can be extremely powerful for someone’s identity.”
How does a quarter-life crisis affect our sense of style? “Fashion is one of the few ways we can change things about ourselves without changing our bodies or doing something more permanent. Historically, how we dressed signified where we belonged. Today, it’s more about self-expression – how we represent where we think we belong.”
© Getty Images“When we choose our clothing, it is a psychological process. We are communicating something about how we perceive ourselves or how we think others will perceive us. It is a very fluid part of our identity, and an amazing way to experiment with who we are.”
So, even if your quarter-life crisis is wreaking havoc on your wardrobe, it’s not the end of the world. In fact, it could be a positive act of play.
A relief indeed. But how can we help ourselves through our wardrobe wobbles? “If you are going through a quarter-life crisis, you want to find the stable parts of your life – friends, family, routine – and find a safe place to discuss those instabilities,” Dr. Boss says. “Stay in contact with the people and places that are good for you. Changing parts of ourselves takes time; it’s not a light switch.”
After all that, it seems that my quarter-life crisis was the kick up the bum I needed. The key is to welcome in the rogue choices, the good, the bag and the ugly, with open arms. Who knows, an iconic fashion moment, as memorable as the side ponytails and bandage dresses of the 2010s, might be just around the corner. It could bring a smile to your face years from now as you flip through old photo albums, reminiscing about the style that defined a (somewhat tumultuous) era.
Embracing a new version of yourself can feel confusing, especially when it involves a shift in personal style. However, as mental as they seem, these clothing conundrums signify a new lease of life. It’s just about unearthing that kernel of confidence amidst the chaos.
How to style out a quarter-life crisis:
© Getty
© Getty
© Getty
© GettyHow I would style out my personal quarter-life crisis:
A quarter-life crisis-coded look comes in many shapes and sizes. Call me sentimental, but my personal choice would be a pair of Y2K Juicy Couture joggers paired with a slogan tee reading ‘Sometimes all you need is $500 million dollars,’ because this could easily cover therapy costs with a mega shopping spree on the side. The Fendi glasses represent where I want to be in five years time – rich and successful enough to pull off some pink designer shades studded with crystals. The Moon Boots have been on my wishlist for quite some time now and add a cosy element to this confused-chic look. As for the pouch, well, that speaks for itself.
- TOP: Vetements Slogan T-Shirt, £403, FARFETCH
- TROUSERS: Almond Blossom Velour Diamanté Tracksuit Bottoms, £75, JUICY COUTURE
- BAG: Fragile Pochette, £390, ANYA HINDMARCH
- SUNGLASSES: First Crystal, £400, FENDI
- SHOES: Faux Fur Cream Mules, £265, MOON BOOT
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